why bother

i have been spending a fair amount of time this week wondering how Lazarus died the second time- or if he is still around for that matter. i recently reread and rewatched Kazantzakis' 'last temptation of Christ' in which Lazarus is killed by Saul (later known as Paul) for political reasons. I also came across this interesting little piece on the topic by john kavenaugh http://liturgy.slu.edu/5LentA031305/theword_embodied.html

"I wonder how it was when Lazarus died for the second time. Were Mary and Martha there?... Of what did Lazarus eventually die? Was it a recurrence of the original affliction or something unforeseen? Did Mary and Martha, the second time around, think that Jesus could spare Lazarus anew?"

it is a fascinating question, but ultimately, it will not bring life to our church. so, i can't help but wonder why God has put this on my heart as the focus of my thoughts this week. well, i am afraid that it is becoming clearer to me. i think that i had to work through this hypothetical in order to see what was underneath it- namely, this nagging 'why bother?' that continuously lingers. i think that i am missing some of the wonder of the miracles because i am stuck in a 'why bother?' glut. a person was blind 2000 years ago and then they could see. they died sometime later and that was that. lazurus was raised from the dead. but surely he could not have lived much longer, so why bother in the first place?

parallel to this 'why bother?' about Lazarus has been a rather annoying refrain from a cantata that we have been practicing. 'he gladdened each neighborhood- helping wherever he could'. never mind that the first part is biblically wrong (he was chased out of galilee, when he cast legion into the swine the pig owners weren't too happy, and i doubt the money changers were 'gladdened' by his visit). the second part 'helping wherever he could' gets to me. Jesus is God. surely, 'wherever he could' would be a large area. but we only hear about select miracles. for example, Lazarus is the only one raised from the dead.

this, of course, is flawed and unfaithful logic. the 'why bother?' obviously cannot be found in the particular miracle. rather, the particular points to the larger issue, that is, glimpses of God's promise. its not so much that Lazarus himself was raised (though i am sure Lazarus himself thought that that alone was enough), but it is the larger promise that such raising represents. the blind man can now see so that God could show God's BIG plan.

this, of course, is the approach that i am going to take for saturday and sunday's sermons. i am (hopefully) not going to get bogged down in what happened to Lazarus, which Mary is mentioned, the archeology relating to the valley of dry bones. rather, i believe that God has refined these banalaties out of me this week, so that i could focus on the good stuff this weekend. God's promise for salvation, the resurrection of our bodies and souls, the breath of life back into the church.